'It was so dark': Tennis star Nick Kyrgios opens up on mental health struggles

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Nick Kyrgios has opened up   astir  his struggles with intelligence   health.

(CNN)Tennis prima Nick Kyrgios has opened astir the intelligence wellness issues that helium has battled passim his career, saying helium struggled with cause and intoxicant maltreatment and besides self-harm.

The enigmatic Australian, whose on-court outbursts often marque him a divisive fig among tennis fans, has ever been candid astir his analyzable narration with the sport.

Kyrgios admitted helium "hated" his beingness but says the planetary lockdown successful 2020 owed to the coronavirus pandemic helped him statesman to flooded immoderate of those battles aft helium had "spiraled retired of control."

    "It was precise serious, to the constituent of self-harm and it's not okay," the 27-year-old told Wide World of Sports. "I conjecture I pushed everyone that cared astir maine distant and I wasn't communicating, and I conscionable unopen down existent beingness and I was trying to grip and tackle my problems head-on.

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      "I was abusing intoxicant a lot, drugs and that spiraled retired of control. Now, I hardly drink, I virtually person a solid of vino astatine dinner. That was the archetypal benignant of happening I had to cleanable up a small spot and past physique my narration backmost with my household and get into healthier habits similar the basics; similar diet, getting bully sleep, trying to bid a small spot much and that was it.

      "I deliberation Covid helped maine a batch with that."

      During his darkest moments, Kyrgios says helium felt similar helium was "letting radical down each the time."

        He says helium believed astatine times that radical helium met "really didn't attraction who I was arsenic a quality being, alternatively conscionable a tennis subordinate ... the brainsick tennis player."

        He added: "I felt worthless to beryllium honest, I didn't consciousness comfortable, I hated my beingness astatine 1 stage.

        "I was cutting, burning, conscionable beauteous f**ked up sh*t. It was truthful acheronian that I benignant of liked it arsenic well, similar asking radical to bash it and stuff. What doesn't termination you makes you alien (and stronger). I'm inactive a spot cooked."

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        Kyrgios says that helium is profoundly affected by the maltreatment helium has received connected societal media implicit the years.

        The Australian Open's men's doubles winner, who was calved to a Greek begetter and a Malay mother, has revealed connected a fig of occasions however often helium has to look racist maltreatment connected societal media.

          "I woody with it each the time," helium explains. "People conscionable deliberation raising the finger, abusing idiosyncratic oregon making racist comments is acceptable successful this time and age, and I conscionable don't deliberation that's acceptable astatine all. Now, you conscionable person to usage it arsenic motivation, but that's easier said than done.

          "People speech sh*t astir you and bash atrocious things. They're achieving thing to what you're achieving. You person to conscionable effort and brushwood it disconnected and usage it arsenic information and cling onto the radical astir you that nonstop you affirmative vigor each the time."

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